Episode 31: Social Media

Written By Kayla Crum

We’re not treading any new ground here when we say social media is controversial. It connects us… and it depresses us. It sparks our imagination… and leaves us feeling lonely. Today on the podcast, the sisters discuss the good, the bad, and the ugly sides of social media and how it can be used during a time of isolation.

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TRANSCRIPT

 Kayla 0:09

 You're listening to the My Sister’s Cancer podcast. I'm Kayla Crum, registered nurse and writer.

 Ella 0:15

 And I'm Ella Beckett, social worker and cancer survivor.

 Kayla 0:20

 We're sisters on a mission to care for the cancer community through the sharing of real life stories, a sprinkle of sass, and lots of support. 

Ella 0:28

Join us in a new kind of pity party. It's a pity so many of us carry the heavy burden of cancer alone. So let's make it a party and carry it together.  

—-------------------

Kayla 0:42

Welcome back to the My Sister's Cancer podcast. I'm your co-host, Kayla Crum, here with my sister, Ella Beckett. We are on our second episode of 2024. Thanks to all of you who were with us in 2023. If you're new around here, we have a website, mysisterscancer.co, where you can find our whole backlog of episodes dating back to last June. We covered the diagnosis of my sister's cancer and then the treatment phase. And we're currently in the isolation phase. So whether that's physical, mental or a combination, we're currently dealing with the isolation that many cancer patients and their family members feel as part of their cancer experience. Before we jump into today's topic, which is social media and how that both can help and hurt the sense of isolation, we just wanted to encourage you guys to leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify or wherever you listen. It can be like a one sentence review or just a star rating, and that really helps other people find the podcast. So if you have a couple of minutes, we'd really appreciate that. So I'm sure we're not the only ones talking about social media. It's everywhere. And we've all heard about the dangers of social media and about the upsides of social media. And so I don't want to just necessarily add to the white noise today, but really take a look through the lens of cancer. So I guess, Ella, do you want to start by just saying a little bit about the role social media played when you were isolated after your bone marrow transplant? Maybe kind of the good and the bad?

Ella 2:25

 I think we've kind of touched on this before, but I definitely think that social media served as a coping mechanism for me in many ways. I'm naturally a very artistic person, and I was very into creating a certain aesthetic on specifically Instagram. And I feel like this is something that was a little bit bigger and more apparent back in this era of like 2017, early 2018, right? A lot of people were very much making sure that one photo flowed into the next and like it was all a similar color scheme.

Kayla 3:03

 This was before Reels and TikTok. It was still photo-based. 

Ella 3:10

Oh yes. Yes, this is like the good old Instagram when like, people would post just one photo, right? And a lot of times it was very like, staged and somewhat artistic and like, I leaned very heavily into that. But I think I really used it as like, almost a form of self-expression. And like, especially at a time when I was, like, not able to be around a lot of people. To me, it was like a way to communicate to people that I was like, still doing alright. Even if I wasn't necessarily, you know, feeling my best mentally, physically, emotionally. I really think I used it as like, “Hey, I'm still here trying to find some grasp of normalcy.” Because really, in this time in my life, like I had met a lot of people in the few months that I was at college. Right. Like social media was really the main way that you kind of kept up on people's lives, so to speak. So I think it was me trying to still be like, look, like, I still do have a life, even if it's different from what I thought it might be, if that makes sense. 

Kayla 4:27

Yeah, I definitely don't think it's just negative. Like I liked how you said it was self-expression.We’ll obviously get into the dark sides of all that later. But yeah, like it was one way for you to communicate with the world. It was a way for you to be artistic because you have an artistic streak. And for a while you were like, painting and things, but when you weren't even feeling up to that, you could still sort of express yourself or enjoy looking at other people's like, aesthetically pleasing images, right, on Instagram. Did Facebook play a role for you at all, or was that not really a part of your experience?

Ella 5:05

 Yeah, I think Facebook was a little bit more of the older generation in my life. Like I would always make sure to share on Facebook to, you know, there's the option if you're posting on Instagram, like you can have it post to Facebook too. And I think that's where I would really interact with like older relatives or like people from church and things like that. That's really where they would kind of comment their support. Another thing that I'm just thinking of, and we'll probably touch on this more in a little bit, but I definitely felt very supported and like, I was getting a lot of really positive comments that like, the way that I was expressing myself and kind of sharing what I was going through, people found to be very encouraging and uplifting. And I think a lot of people resonated with a lot of what I was sharing. And so that kind of snowballed into me wanting to keep sharing and almost using it as like a public journal in some ways, processing maybe some of my faith thoughts or things like that in this more public arena. 

 

Kayla 6:15

Social media has changed so much in the past six or seven years since you were in the thick of your cancer. Now it seems to me that I interact and consume a lot more… not - I guess they would be called influencers, but like content creators’ work, and that just did not have as big of a presence five, six, seven years ago - you were primarily interacting with friends and maybe friends of friends. I feel like it was still an extension of your actual social network back then. And now it's really evolved into sort of connecting with strangers or like content creators. So just for people listening who maybe, you know, weren't on social media that long ago, if you're younger than us, like it was different back then. However, I do remember you got this, like, huge surge of followers when you were like, diagnosed. And then when you relapsed, And it's like weird, like you almost were like mini-famous within our larger social community for being sick. Was that like weird because it was like… did that make you feel supported or did that make you feel a little bit like… like a side show? 

Ella 7:27

Yeah, I think both. I mean, I think we had this conversation in one of our earliest episodes about like, social media and how we - I kind of had some grief tourists that, like, latched on to my story and were kind of just - came out of the woodwork or whatever, but I think largely it made me feel supported. Like I think I enjoyed having somewhat of a platform to be able to share to people who were interested, whether they directly knew me or not. 

Kayla 7:59

Yes, I don't want to demonize or discount like the power of connection that you probably experienced, and that I'm sure people going through it now experience. I've since found many other, like, cancer accounts, which we've highlighted in other episodes that are, you know, people you would never meet, you maybe wouldn't interact with as many young adult cancer patients if you didn't have these, like, social media ways to connect with people. So it's not only a way for you to connect with friends, but also with like, other people who get what you're going through. Back to the support, though. I remember getting to a point where I felt or questioned… when people would leave comments or likes or whatever on your posts. Or later when I started sort of posting about you, which we'll get into in a minute. Um, when they would comment and post on my stuff, sometimes I would just have this voice in my head saying, like, “They just checked us off for the day.” And I think that social media in general makes us think we've kept up with people that we truly don't have a relationship with anymore, or it's actually awkward if you run into them in the grocery store because you’re like, seeing every life update about them for the last five years, but like, never seen them in person. So you like know too much? 

Ella 9:24

Totally. 

Kayla 9:25

That's created a weird social or I guess they'd call it a parasocial relationship. They often talk about that with fans and creators. But even among people like you used to know in high school and you haven't seen since, say they're home for the holidays and you run into them, it's weird because you actually feel like you've kept up on their life, but like…

Ella 9:44

Haven't talked to them. 

Kayla 9:45

You haven't talked to them, you don't support them, you don't have relationships. So I felt a little bit of that when people would be like, “You're so inspiring, love this.” Whatever. Maybe you could send a card or like bring a meal or actually text me directly instead of like hitting “like” on the post. Did you ever have any of those feelings or was it just support for you at the time?

Ella 10:10

 No, as you're saying this, I'm like nodding and saying mhm. Because I'm definitely resonating with a lot of what you're saying, I guess, to put language around it, almost like a false sense of support. And I think what you were saying is so true that like in a lot of our minds, it's like, oh, we, we have checked in with that person or oh, you know, if someone something happens and someone posts about it, it's like, oh, I commented. But then if you like, don't actually follow up with that person or check in two months later or whatever, it just feels like it falls a little bit flat.

Kayla 10:47

And I'm not suggesting you send cards or meals to like every person you ever went to high school with who is on your social media friends list. I just feel like sometimes the people that we actually do have a relationship with, it's easy to kind of shove in the category with all those other people on social media and like, neglect the real relationship because life's busy. And like, we were in college at the time when this was happening and it's just like, yeah, just like it and comment and move on. Right. I mean, that's - it's also less awkward because, oh, there's a fancy word for this that I can't think of, like when people Marco Polo each other and you're not talking live, you know, it's like they can comment and then you can comment back, but they don't have to sit there and be brave enough to, like, say something or even text you and be like, oh, I hope that comes across okay. And oh, she's got the three dots. What is she saying back to me? Like, oh, or she's seen it like, there's all this etiquette and like stress almost around communicating that's elevated when somebody is hurting and we feel uncomfortable around hurt and suffering. And social media is just a great - I'm saying great not in a good way, but like it's a great barrier. Like you don't have to feel the pain. You can just support the person and move on with your day. 

Ella 12:04

Totally.

Kayla 12:05

 Now, I'm not saying I wish nobody liked your posts, like, this is a - this is a two things are true situation and there's probably some of both in there, right?

Ella 12:14

 Yeah, there were definitely days where I found the supportive comments to be super supportive and genuine and uplifting to me. So no, two things can be true for sure. 

Kayla 12:25

And I will say, when you do run into people - like I've run into people from various points of our life who kept up on your story from social media that then shock me with like, how much knowledge they have and how in-tune they were with your story. Even though we didn't know they were following along, they were probably one of like 200 likes, right? But then, like, I've run into somebody in the library who was like, “How is your sister? Like, didn't she get married recently? Like, how was her health?” And like that's the kind of thing where I hadn't seen that person in like five years, right? Pre-social media time, they wouldn't have probably even known what was going on. To me that's the - the best case scenario. Like you've been consuming my story online and then you have the bravery to like bring it out to my face kind of thing. Like that's a true supportive action. And like we're not friends. I don't need you to take me out to coffee. But like, we ran into each other and you brought it up to me, and like, that meant so much to me. Now, enough about other people. I do want to talk about our part in all of this social media stuff. Where to begin? I think that most people, especially people probably age like 15 to 30, will maybe feel aligned with what we're saying, that social media has quite the pull, quite the addictive pull. It's a huge part of relating to your peers as you like, move through your teens and twenties and has really changed the landscape of like, friendship and parties and who was where with whom. So we're not immune to that. And then when you marry that with like, cancer, I think it gets complicated even more than it was before. So what comes to mind on like your end? Not just you consuming it, but like you posting. And what was that experience like?

Ella 14:28

 I mean, I think one important point to make toward the beginning here of this part of our conversation would be that social media is such a highlight reel of our lives, and I think that gets complicated when cancer is in the picture, because you want to, like, keep people informed, like you were saying, right? It can be used as such a helpful tool to keep people informed. But then it's like it's not all good news. There's not a lot of highlights to give, and you're still feeling that pull to make everything look a little bit more glittery and wonderful than it actually is, right? Because we all do that. We're all guilty of that. At least I know for myself and the closest people in my life like, you post the good stuff. Like you don't always post the behind the scenes things that are actually really terrible. Um, and yeah, even if you're honest and candid in your posts, like, it just doesn't capture the full human experience. 

Kayla 15:37

And I think that on social media, I've seen when people share hard things, and this includes you and me, there's almost a requirement, like an unspoken need at the end to either put like, “Thanks for all your support!” or “Please pray for me” or “But I know God's got this.” Like you can't just like say the bad update and leave it hanging there. We all know that people who will post like, “Feeling so sad today” and then they want people to like comment back and be like “You okay? Text me girl.” Like that's, that's a whole different brand of social media interaction. But like if you were gonna post like “My transplant got pushed back two months.” Like social media's vibe almost requires that you're like, “But I'm so thankful to have such a supportive family and great team taking care of me.” Like that's what I see on social media. Do you know what I mean?

Ella 16:39

 Well, just yeah, in some ways you're like twisting your own truth and your own story a little bit. It's like social media is you marketing your own story in many ways, and often you're gonna change that story or leave parts out of that story that are appealing to whoever's reading. Right. 

Kayla 16:59

And this differs from those like, care blogs, like there's different brands out there, but you'll see, like, you can get email updates and it's like a traditional blog. So Mom, I think, often posted on yours and sometimes you did. That was a little more nitty gritty, like medical details about what was happening with you. So that's a little different than social media, but you still have that ability to like, comment and interact under the posts. And there's still that need to be like, “We appreciate all your support.” I'm not saying I need people or that it would be healthy if everyone just was like, “Well, this terrible thing happened” with like, no, that's maybe not what social media is for, but it just creates such a false sense of reality because we don't do that. Yeah, like you said, it's the highlight reel. And I think people thought you were much more physically well than you were based on how you appeared on social media. And like the rare public appearances you would make, like - that makes it sound like you're a celebrity. [laughter] But when you would go out in public -

Ella 18:07

[laughter] “Spotted!”

 

Kayla 18:08

You would do your wig nice and wear a cute outfit and probably take one of those pictures for Instagram. And when you see five of them in a row in the last month and a half, you're like, oh, she's living this active life. She looks cute, she looks healthy. Whereas like, I would see you at home, bald on the couch, feeling terrible. And I almost just think it's not like I'm asking you to share that private part of your story. Like I don't need you to post those pictures of like, yourself at your worst. I'm just wrestling with like how again, like, people probably thought you were okay when you weren't okay.

 

Ella 18:51

 Totally. Yeah, I think that's exactly right. And I think some of that too, like going back to the coping mechanism piece of it. I think in some ways I was almost like trying to prove that I was okay, even to myself. Right? Like, oh, well, if I just, I mean, I was wearing fake eyelashes, I was curling my wig. I was spending lord knows how long picking out an outfit. Right? Because it's those little things that it's like, well, if I just look okay, like, maybe I am okay. Like, I think there was just some deeper psychological aspect to all of that that I obviously didn't realize in the moment.

Kayla 19:32

 And it's hard because I think we've all experienced the power of like getting out of your sweatpants and putting on a real outfit and actually feeling better, you know, about your day. So there is something to that. But then, yeah, social media amplifies everything. And so it's like putting that front out. There is a way to tell yourself, look, I'm having the same lovely life as everyone else. And I think there was a change between your first cancer and your second. A lot of your posts, if you scroll back from your first cancer, were just like inspiring quotes and like uplifting messages, um, with cute photos of you. Whereas your second cancer, you did get a little more real in the captions about like, hey, this is hard or whatever, and you still did have sort of a positive twist, but it was like you acknowledged even that you had cancer. Whereas a lot of your posts the first time around, you were just like, I'm a sunflower in a field, or you know what I mean? Like, I don't know, “you grow through what you go through.”

Ella 20:35

[laughter] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think some of it too is that because I was just starting out at college, like, um, and again, like, if those of you who are listening were on Instagram in 2017 like, it was just a different time, it really was, like, I just feel like it was so much more about like people were always posting like who they were with, right? And like where they went. And it was very much like - like a status, fear of missing out. And I, I struggled a lot obviously with comparison because here I am, like you said, bald, sad and tired on my couch. Like scrolling through all these photos of everyone that I was supposed to be experiencing college with, like just carrying on with their lives. Like, of course I was jealous and struggled with the fear of missing out. Um, and so again, I think that's part of why I wanted to like, put on a good face and like, still be creating content, so to speak, to like, feel like I was still having the normal, young adult experience, whatever the heck that is.

Kayla 21:48

 Yeah. The scrolling and consuming is, I mean, still, right, we all battle that. And like, I know I have like, social media limits on my phone that I literally gave the codes to my husband because I couldn't even adhere to the warnings when they would pop up on my own phone. Like, I need to not know the code to get in more. And I'm an adult who, like, can't control that addiction, I guess. So I can only imagine with all your time that you had available where you didn't feel up to doing a lot. It's like you consumed a lot of content. 

Ella 22:19

Yeah, it's important to ask, too, like when you're walking away from scrolling on your phone for however long. Like, how do you feel, right? Like, do you feel better and more connected to people in your life? Maybe. But most of the time you feel worse about yourself, about your relationships with people. Like, I just think it's important to pause and kind of examine how you're feeling after you're getting off social media and then asking yourself, like, if it's worth spending time, if it's not filling your cup.

 

Kayla 22:54

 I agree. I think that I've also curated who I follow a lot over the last few years, both from a content creator standpoint and just like acquaintances and friends. There were some girls from like high school that just consistently would like, bring up how high school Kayla felt inferior from ten years ago. And it's like, I don't need to keep up with their life. We're not friends. We never were friends. We went to the same school. It's like, maybe I can just unfollow these people so I don't feel those same feelings of adolescent awkwardness and inferiority every time I see their picture perfect post. Like, yeah. And then, you know, the content creators too, it’s like, I follow people now who, like, are more real and don't like, have these carefully crafted posts about their body or like perfect hair. It's like, I like the more realistic influencers, and I think that is a trend that's heading in that direction. But there's still plenty of fake stuff to consume if you want to. Speaking of fake stuff, I knew when we decided to do this episode that we couldn't not talk about the snow angel incident, so…

Ella 24:01

[laughter] Oh no!

Kayla 24:03

To summarize, Ella got the all clear from her first time with cancer in early December/mid December of 2016. So diagnosis like September 1st. Spent all fall doing chemo and then finished up at Thanksgiving, but was kind of waiting on the scans to see if it worked, which we talked about on our Thanksgiving episode. Like you were done, but you weren't really done. And we were waiting. So then you got the news and it was like, okay, you want to update everybody, right? Like, clearly you update the whole - the rollout. You update your family and friends first. But then for the larger audience, how do you do it? And you had this vision in your head of you and me in the snow doing snow angels because it was close to Christmas, like celebrating that you were in remission. And I just have these vivid memories of like, Mom on a ladder in the snow to get like a -

Ella 25:04

Aerial shot.

Kayla 25:05

- of you and me in the snow, and you were like, no, you can't wear snow pants because that's tacky. So we're like, in the snow in our jeans with it soaking through our butts, you know, soaking my skin and underwear. And like, every time you would look at the photos Mom took, they just, like, weren't what you were seeing in your head. I remember mom being pretty neutral and, like, happy to help, but you and I kind of just were going at it and, like, not in a good mood. 

Ella 25:30

There were tears.

Kayla 25:31

 And it’s like, we were supposed to be celebrating. Yeah, there were tears. We were supposed to be celebrating how you were done with cancer. And it just felt like such a manifestation of the entire social media experience to me. Like then later you did post it. Like, if people are friends with you, they can go back and see it. I'll post the picture on Instagram on My Sister's Cancer just so you can see the image. She did end up using one of them. I don't think they ever quite matched the vision you had in your head, but I just was like, this is so stupid. Like, and what I think now, looking back, it's like we didn't realize at the time that remission - getting declared in remission - is the beginning of a super long journey of healing and a reckoning with, like, the trauma you've just gone through. Whereas we thought naively that first time, yay! Did it, finish line. We're gonna do Christmas and then you're going to go back to school, which you literally did like not even a month after that. So. I think we were feeling that angst in that moment, but didn't consciously acknowledge it or like, understand what was happening emotionally. And so that just sticks out in my memory. It's like, how social media interacts with the - the modern cancer experience. What are your memories or thoughts on that?

Ella 26:49

 Oh yeah… I just remember the conflicting emotions, I guess you could say. Right. And like you were saying, I think it was subconscious in the moment. But I remember like in my - in my mind I was like, but we're supposed to be happy. And here we are laying in the snow. I'm literally crying, like I, I was trying to, like, force a smile through the actual tears to like, get this really staged fake photo of like, happy, happy celebration. And like, if that doesn't sum it up, I don't know what does. You know, like, there's just so much going on all at once. [sigh]

Kayla 27:28

It reminds me of your wish trip, also.

Ella 27:30

Yes.

Kayla 27:31

What most people know as a Make-A-Wish trip. But it was through a different, more local organization for kids who are slightly older that went up to age 21. I think Make-A-Wish ends at age 18. Um, so it was super amazing. They sent our whole family to the Bahamas, like, trip of a lifetime. Then that trip in general was just, again with the emotions, right? I think we felt a lot of pressure to make it the trip of a lifetime. You literally only get to go on these trips if you have a terminal illness. So like you were, this was shortly after your transplant, I think, like once you had been cleared to travel and like maybe a year out from your transplant, but still, like the whole reason you're on this amazing trip is because you almost died, right? So like, that's affecting you emotionally. And then you feel all this pressure to make it like equally weighty, like in comparison to what you went through. And amazing. Like, it's almost like you want to make it equally as amazing as, like the horror of your other experience. And like, I remember your feet were really bad with neuropathy from the chemo at the time, so we had to, like, push you in a wheelchair all over this resort, which was not very handicap friendly.

 

Ella 28:43

 The beach was closed. It was too windy. [sigh]

Kayla 28:46

Like the whole time we were there. I think we got to go down there like one day. I mean, there were lovely pools, but like, you're on an island, like you want to go see the ocean. I'm not saying this to complain. Like I'm so thankful we got to do this, but I remember you just wanted this photo drinking out of a coconut. Like that's all you wanted from this trip, truly. And it was the same thing as the snow angels. We had to, like, battle so many things to get your wheelchair down in the sand to, like, go to this guy's like, drink stand. And you drank some sketchy drink out of this coconut to get the photo. And that's on your Instagram too. And it's just like, I just look at that photo and I'm like, that moment was terrible. Like the wind was blowing. It was cold, the beach was closed. You can't even go on the beach you see in the background of the picture. But like you're supposed to be grateful for this trip and like, post how amazing it is. So, like, what were you going to do? I don't know,

Ella 29:39

Well yeah, and you're in the Bahamas like, that's content gold right there. Like you… you better make some good Instagram posts from that, you know.

 

Kayla 29:48

 Yeah. And it's so hard because people are like, oh my gosh, what a trip. And you're like, yeah, yeah. I think it's just a good reminder of how much like, moments can be manufactured. Right. And how you don't know the full story of photos that you're seeing online. And maybe that person actually has a really hard, terrible struggle right now, but they're just like trying to put on a good face and put their best self out there. You were saying earlier that social media was a form of self-expression for you. I want to hold space for that; like it is. There's something to creating these moments or documenting these moments that can be fun and like, lead to good ideas you wouldn't have had otherwise and all of these things. But it has a dark side of robbing you of actually living in the moment. And the moment that gets posted was actually a crappy moment. Oftentimes when I see pictures of kids especially, I'm like, how many photos did it take to get to this one where all four of these children are like, smiling?

Ella 30:57

 Or like bribing, right? Like, what did it take to get that smile? [laughter]

Kayla 31:02

[sigh] Yeah. And we didn't - we're old enough that we didn't grow up on social media. So Facebook became a thing when I was in middle school. So unfortunately, there is middle school Kayla out there on the interwebs. [laughter from Ella] Um, my mom made me wait till you were 13, which was Facebook's minimum age, which, good job Mom. So I was in eighth grade. I'm glad like, my parents weren't posting about me from age 0 to 13, which now that's like everyone is doing that. And I'm not here to, like, cast judgment. I'm just thinking about how, just like we were saying earlier, that we didn't realize at the time what we were doing with the snow angel thing and how much we would have to unpack. I feel like that's kind of also social media as it continues to change and grow. It's like we don't really realize the impact of what we're doing to our kids by documenting their whole life, or adults by us documenting our whole life online, not even just from a privacy perspective, but from how it changes how we view our moments that we're living. We might look back and be like, that was crazy.

Ella 32:10

 Well, and I think when I was saying like manufacturing moments and then what you were just saying made me think of like, I mean, from a sociological perspective, there's the whole aspect of like performative acts, right? Like how much of what you're putting out there is you performing in some ways, or like when I was talking about how, right, I would wear a nice outfit and put on all this makeup and whatever, like, was that really me, or was that performing who I thought I should be in that moment? You know, like there's so many layers there with like the performative aspect of social media too.

Kayla 32:46

 Yeah. And I want to acknowledge my own part of this too. I clearly started a website and a podcast called My Sister's Cancer. So like, I am no saint when it comes to using someone's story like yours to like - get followers makes it sound bad. But like, I wanted to connect with other siblings of cancer patients. But you know, with the way social media works, I was trying to like, get followers and get likes and all this stuff. And that led to the podcast. I did for months just have like an Instagram and a website, and this feels a lot more genuine to me and more honest because you and I can process all these things together. But yeah, I was processing like my experience of your cancer on social media. Granted, it was like 4 or 5 years after the fact, and I checked with you before I did it. But yeah, that's not totally a pure motive either. Like I was getting something or some sort of feedback from that. And I think it's good and bad in some ways. I met some people and like, felt seen in my experience as an adult sibling cancer patient. But I could feel that pull of like trying to make the reels, because now it's all video and like trying to attract people to my story and whatever. And it's like none of us are innocent in this anymore, and not - nobody who's on the internet, I guess I should say. What's your sage advice for everyone on navigating social media during a cancer experience? Is there anything you would change about what you did or anything you do now that you wish you had done then? 

Ella 34:35

 I think one of the biggest things is I would have just spent less time on social media overall.

Kayla 34:43

 Unfortunately, at this point in the recording, Ella's internet cut out. So this is Kayla just summarizing for you what else she said about social media before we sign off. In addition to saying less time on social media overall, Ella wanted to encourage people to take the time to reflect on what parts of social media are helpful versus what parts are tearing you down. Like we mentioned earlier in the episode, talking it over with a trusted friend or journaling about it is a good way to reflect on that. Or if you have a counselor, that's a great topic to discuss with them and if needed, like some sort of accountability partner is also a great place to keep each other accountable to social media limits. There's other ways to exercise those creative energies, even if it's like, something digital still, like drawing on your iPad or your phone. There's a lot of apps out there that can help you lean into that aesthetic, creative side of yourself without getting into the performative aspects of social media and encouraging you to just create art for the sake of art without leaving your bed whenever you can still be on your phone. And from a consumption standpoint, you know there's so many streaming platforms out there too; cancer is a great time to catch up on every TV show you never saw and that, I think, is a little less loaded than the constant consumption of other people in your life or influencers. So we hope that you found something helpful in today's episode. We'll be back with you next week. And until then, we hope that you have the best week available to you.

Kayla Crum
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Episode 30: New Year, New You?